A while ago I came across a saying whose basic gist was this: Hell is being on your deathbed and meeting the person you could have been.
There’s nothing like being inspired from a negative. I was. Desperate for change, knowing I couldn’t go on the way I was, failing on all fronts, I had to take the plunge and do something different.
I had to take that risk. Otherwise the same stresses would have driven me further into depression and misery.
Now that I’m pursuing my dreams, I have a whole different set of stresses! But it’s okay. I’m also enjoying myself. I’m having fun. I’m learning stuff, meeting people I love, and I know I’m doing all I can do.
Before I was stressed and miserable. Now I have good reasons to be stressed, and I’m living well too. So the choice is obvious.
I’m living well because I made the decision - because I had to - to change. Knowing what I lacked and facing the fear and doing something about it anyway. The fear of staying the same was much worse than the fear of stepping outside of my comfort zone.
And by doing the scary thing, and overcoming that fear, I got to do more less scary and more fun things and so my life, and myself grew and continues to grow.
I found the right therapy (a wonderful mixture of dumb luck and pursuing my dreams) and everything grew from there.
Take the first step. And live the life you want to live.